CARTOON: Madtown - Angel Episode - 05-16-06

[Rieping]

Greetings in Christ,

For your critique (please)...
another cartoon.

www.deviantart.com/deviation/33410774/

It was actually my first attempt at drawing digitally with a intuos2 tablet instead of on paper...

May God bless you always.

Your servant in Christ,
John

[syme]

John,

That's funny. I like it's silly humor.

As far as the actual drawing, though, I don't really think it is up to par with the earlier cartoon you showed us (even taking into account that this one is black and white). My biggest problem is with the wings. I realize you ought to keep things simple for a cartoon, but his wings just seem kind of awkward. I also don't love the single fold at the bottom of his tunic.

Finally, if you want to get really crazy with it, I would suggest giving him a different body posture, especially as far as his arms go. You could put them in a posture that expresses his frustration with his halo a bit more. The posture of the head, hair and halo is not bad.

Sorry for being so critical! Just trying to help!!!

[pierregambotsky]

Well, if you need criticism, then what I would recommend is getting rid of the shading you did using what looks like some sort of airbrush tool. I say either keep it completely black and white, or go all out in the shading, but don't try to negotiate a middle ground in this case.

[Rieping]

Thanks both of you for the comments. They're good reminders. I take no offense especially because it was my first cartoon in many years (roughly 14 years to be exact) and it was my first experiment with digital cartooning on the computer. I had submitted it to "Dappled Things" and they wanted me to revise and re-submit it after receiving feedback on the forums.

All that said, I do sincerely want your comments because although I hope I've improved a little since that first cartoon I have always been weakest in drawing human beings (cartoon animals are far easier for me). I recently bought a book on human facial expressions, which has been very interesting. But I have yet to put my reading into practice... so revising this cartoon might be a good experiment with that.

[antonio449]

I can't comment on all the technical aspects as the I last time I drew on a computer was in the late Paleolithic. But the idea is money. Bad halo day, har! har!

[snowpetal]

I also can't comment on the technical aspects since I'm a wordsmith, not an artist; and I also realize that you posted this now months ago, but I wanted to tell you I like this idea. Are you still around? Have you done any more?

Do you mind that the inner editor in me does kick in? You really don't need 'After it slipped down for the third time'. Just the drawing and the 'bad halo day' line together are strong, and enough.

[Rieping]

Thank you. I'm still around, but due to my short attention span I keep shifting from personal project to personal project. I have a bad habit of doing many things with mediocrity rather than doing one thing well.


Here are my other digital cartoons created after the angel one...

"Angel Jasmine" -- An experiment in 3D art using demo software
www.deviantart.com/deviation/33412312/

"Fear the Mascot"
www.deviantart.com/deviation/33790055/

"Love Triangle"
www.deviantart.com/deviation/39452806/

Concert flier for a friend's Christian band
www.deviantart.com/deviation/43745827/

And that's about it for art except for photo manipulations and work-related projects (I used to be a graphic designer up until recently). My online "gallery" is here...

philangelus.deviantart.com/gallery/

I have also written a short story, newspaper articles, and many poems since I drew "Bad Halo Day", and have recorded a few songs and made a music video or two. I'm trying to use self-control to keep myself from dabbling in animation too. As you can see, I'm all over the place.
;D