Post by gmspencer on Oct 18, 2010 19:00:07 GMT -5
I’d like to write tonight and I’d like to feel not so bad about myself
as I do, not look back over my own left shoulder this once,
see how crooked my rows would be if I were plowing a field
like my father did and feeling like I have betrayed him,
but I can’t say how exactly because the thing is I see
so many betrayals that it is hard to pick only one.
Boy do I feel it, like a slap in the face; he’s gone and I feel it.
I want to have a little mercy on myself and I would if I
I thought I deserved it, but I know I don’t.
But no matter - if I only knew how to have mercy on myself
I’d do it anyway, but mercy, no matter what anybody says
isn’t cheap and it sure as hell isn’t easy.
To tell the truth I don’t really know anymore.
I’d just like to feel not so bad about myself, as I do.
as I do, not look back over my own left shoulder this once,
see how crooked my rows would be if I were plowing a field
like my father did and feeling like I have betrayed him,
but I can’t say how exactly because the thing is I see
so many betrayals that it is hard to pick only one.
Boy do I feel it, like a slap in the face; he’s gone and I feel it.
I want to have a little mercy on myself and I would if I
I thought I deserved it, but I know I don’t.
But no matter - if I only knew how to have mercy on myself
I’d do it anyway, but mercy, no matter what anybody says
isn’t cheap and it sure as hell isn’t easy.
To tell the truth I don’t really know anymore.
I’d just like to feel not so bad about myself, as I do.