On the importance of wrastlin'

[firefolk]

AHA! At last the new webpage is upon us, and mine is the inaugural forum post. Is this a blog? Can I call this the inaugural blogural? No--no, let's pretend I didn't say that. I suppose I could just hit the Delete key, but it's way up there and my pinkie is like all the way down here by the Shift key and, no, I'm just not up for it right now. Where was I--ah yes! It's time to unveil my greatest discovery, folks. We've all heard of Jove, the great king of the Graeco-Roman pantheon and largest of the planets. But what few of us realize is that the name "Jove" is actually a worn-down version of "Juventud Guerrera," professional wrestler and lord of the WWE! It's true, I checked. I have this--machine. You wouldn't understand. But anyways, to this mighty luchadore we owe the entirety of world mythology and all the high poetry of the ages: indeed, practically all human language. Some may say (if they're DUMB-HEADS) that the ancient gods obviously antedate the Guerrera brothers by untold millenia; but as anyone in his five wits must clearly perceive, when Juventud first came into his powers back in the late '90s, he instantly transcended time and space. The mere fact that there is no trace in recorded literature of the full name Juventud Guerrera, conclusively proves that his influence stretches back to before the dawn of reliable record-keeping methods. By the time we first begin to hear of the mighty one, the tides of philological entropy have already worked their attrition and "Juventud" has become, simply, "Jove." Therefore, I submit to you the following conclusion: er--well. . . I guess technically I have not necessarily yet completely drawn my conclusions altogether, per se, as it were. At this time. But they are mighty. Or shall be--shall have been mighty. Shall be going to have been. Let me get back to you. This is what happens when I write these things after only one cup of coffee.

[estiel]

If Jove is "a worn-down version" of Juventud, Jehovah might also be derivative.
(This will surely not offend. Anyone who can come up with "blogural" should not claim to be offended by *anything*.)

[firefolk]

"Offend," "offend". . . that sounds so familiar. It's something to do with ice cream, isn't it? Nah, I don't offend easily. Er, well, actually I probably offend all the time--I mean I don't take offense easily. But regarding your contention, my research indicates that Juventud never interacted with the Hebrew populace; although, interestingly, a new school of thought maintains that some manner of etymological connection exists between "Jupiter" and "Jasmine," the princess from Aladdin. Goes to show you never know about words. (Or Graeco-Roman deities.)